I hate this thing so much. It's scary, it's smart, did I mention ugly?, and HUGE. The tunneled web is almost as gross as the thing itself. I call it the mother spider. And it's life must end. The last few nights we've seen it crawl out of it's nasty home and sit out for hunting. Creepiest looking thing of my life. Andrew has already made 2 attempts at killing it, with no luck. It's made it into that terrible corner both times, and NOW we've only pissed it off. I know it knows. And it is definitely angry. I swear it watches me if I let Birdie out because recently I've seen it's legs moving around (I have chills and a very fast heart rate going right now as I tell you this). And it's re-enforced it's fortress and I think it knows what's about to happen. I am now worried it's plotting to attack Turdling, and I can't sleep at night. I stay up for hours paranoid that it's children are the reasons I feel an 'itch' or a 'tickle' on my leg/body, and I feel sorry Andrew has to deal with my reactions, although I think I could scream and he'd continue sleep talking.
I'm not overreacting. No. I know I'm not because in the month and a half that we've been here, I have seen and killed more spiders then I've ever seen in my LIFE. I KID YOU NOT. We have found many 'mini-mothers' in the house and frankly I'm about to lose it. I worry that Bird is going to get bit in the night in her cage on the floor. And I now make my bed in the most anal way possible to make SURE I don't tuck any in comfortably. I have reason, considering I've found 2 on my made bed, and 3 on the lovesac. I SIT AND SLEEP IN THESE PLACES!
For the first time in my life I actually understand summer sales, and those turd friends of mine who wheel and deal and sell pest control. I've never seen a need, nor found their cause worthy, but that's only because my sweet sweet landlord has always had our home sprayed in the spring, and we've lived spider free for our entire marriage. Have I thanked you for that, Mindy? THANK YOU! Also, the only pest we dealt with growing up was always an insane amount of ants due to the fact that our house was built on their 'hill'.
Anyway, tonight when Andrew gets home it's WAR. We will not stop until I know this thing is dead and gone. I can't do this anymore. I would rather swim with sharks then live with these terrors around my home --oh wait, I've already done the first... happily.
Operation END MOTHER SPIDER starts now. With our spade, spray (I'm going to purchase in MINUTES), jar, shoes, whatever it takes.
it's going down.
or so help me..
or so help me..